PSY 101 Psychology
An overview of the male psyche, with special attention paid to the psychology
of Simon Cowell.
PSY 102 Psychology
of Simon Cowell (Pre-Requisite: PSY 101)
An in-depth study of the psychological profile of Simon Cowell. Emphasis
on information procurement and historical methods of behavior modification.
PSY 201 Psychology
of Sexuality in Theory
A look at the psychological basis of eroticism, arousal, and the importance
of fantasy. No prerequisite; all students are already fantasizing about Simon Cowell and no further screening is necessary.
PSY 202 Psychology
of Sexuality in Practice (Pre-requisite: PSY 201)
Explores practical methods of fostering creativity and igniting arousal.
Course is specific to the practice of sex with Simon Cowell.
PSY 301 Psychology
Studies nurturing Simon Cowell through the dating phase to proposal of marriage.
Includes practical advice for subtle manipulation, as he is unlikely to reach the altar if left to his own devices.
PSY 302 Psychology of
Marriage (Pre-Requisite: PSY 301)
An overivew of the dynamic between spouses with attention paid to conflict
management and unpleasant task negotiation.
PSY 401 Behavior
Change Methods (Pre-Requisite: PSY 102)
As wonderful as Simon Cowell certainly is, no doubt his wife will find behavior
she would wish to change. Course offers practical methods for subtle behavior modification.
PSY 420 Juvenile
An overview of young Simon Cowell's indiscretions, with methods of anticipating
offenses from Mr. Cowell's future children. Some practical advice on parenting a bus-hijacking teenaged boy is given.
Fire extinguisher use is also discussed.